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Unavailable for purchase. Continue shopping Checkout Continue shopping. Chi ama i libri sceglie Kobo e inMondadori. Dreams and Schemes Beware! Dear Widow and Widower by M. Choose Store. Or, get it for Kobo Super Points! Skip this list. Ratings and Book Reviews 0 0 star ratings 0 reviews. Remember YOLO! You Only Live Once! My husband passed away at age It was a huge funeral with lots of support pledged to our family. It was great! It felt normal again. I understand so well! My husband passed away a year ago after a year of declining health.

I do lunches and movies with friends, and the occasional party or group event, but so often I will learn of an event on a weekend that looks like fun, but not by myself! My husband was a wonderful guy who could fix or build anything I needed and was always up for fun. I miss all that. On top of losing him, nearly all my family have drifted south in the last year, leaving me with more difficult decisions to consider. Instead, I have my dogs to snore me to sleep. Hi, I am an 8 year widow as of May,1, I noticed the time of your post.

I find nights to be the hardest time to pass without feeling lonely. I have lots of energy so I can keep busy during the day but I wonder will nights ever get easier? Karen, I have been widowed since I do love my friend who sees no threat in me speaking to her husband or in him joining us. Generally we all laugh and have a good time and I remember it really not so bad to be alone! I find I have to do almost all the inviting with my friends. People are very busy. Dorothy, l have been a widow for 4yrs now and l tell you this life of widow hood has not been an easy task, l have two daughters, my husband was involved in an accident and perished on the spot, life has never been the same again.

My husband passed 54 yrs old. I agree with u completely. I miss the male energy in a conversation. But I do miss the conversation. I feel the same way since wife passed with cancer! I feel the same! How far are you from Pennsylvania! Contact me if you want you sound very sincere! Hi Ray, I just came across your post from Sept. I lost my husband 15 months ago. My friends are all married and have busy lives. It seems the stay away ,like widowhood is contagious or something lol. I was wondering what part of Pa you call home? Bensalem outside of phila. I agree with everything u say good luck.

I became widowed at age 55, and now almost 8 years have passed. It has definitely not been easy coming home to an empty home, with nobody to talk to. I am fortunate in that I still have a full time job, to keep me occupied. I have joined numerous dating sites, to only encounter scammers. Yet, I have not given up on finding a companion in my life. We all need friends and affection in our lives. Many people have told me that when I least expect it, I will meet someone special. I just hope that they are right. Dear Ida Thank you so much for sharing your experience.

There are so many people who feel the same way and have also had a terrible tragedy. The last thing you need is to put yourself out there only to get fake profiles and scammers terrorizing you. May God soon open up a way to put you back on rail is all that I pray. I shall carry remembrance of an unknown YOU in my prayers.

I have no kids, had a long relationship that ended painfully before marriage but would like to spend my life with a lonely widow. To be blunt, it sucks! I end up watching the various channels on where I want to go. It seems like a badge of courage to be divorced 4 or 5 times, but a curse to be widowed.

A friend of mine told me that Prince Charming had to put that slipper on lots of feet. I guess Prince Charming had his version of kissing frogs!

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Keep that shoehorn handy, you never know where Cinderella may pop up! Hi I am a widow also of 8 years and even though you still gave your friends it is no longer the same, because the invitations to BBQ eye are only for couples, and if you are not into the pub and club scene now you are on your own it is very difficult to meet people. You go one sites looking for someone to share with and there does not seem to be genuine people there.

I am a very young 66 year old and I would dearly love to find someone to share the future with. I am not at all bitter, just a realist…. While our gender ages , it seems males, irrespective of how old they are , are regarded as distinguished…. The fact is there are far more women available to take advantage of your wallet… The only thing that makes you marketable after Question why do you think the online dating sites dislike us?

Thanks for your comments. Really sorry to hear about your experiences. Our lives were going full speed when they were abruptly halted. I wonder if this site is any different? I can so relate to the widows I have just been reading about. I dont think I would have made it without the love of my 2 girls and my wonderful dog Monty. I had a relationship for 8yrs which turned out to be a terrible mistake. It makes you very wary of meeting the opposite sex. I like being on my own most of the time but nights are quite hard sometimes you tend to miss conversation.

Anyway I soldier on I have a lot to be grateful. I love all kinds of music and I am lucky to have good hearing to enjoy it. To me online dating is a necessary evil, believe me that I should have put in capital letters the word EVIL! I remember my first experience, at dinner, I mentioned that I was a widower.

They are so screwed up. My response was that it is on my profile. Another time, I was going out with someone for about 3 weeks. I decided to cook her dinner at my home. Now at this point in time, both of my children were in college. Anyway, we had dinner, watched tv. This one photo was of a family trip of us to Disney.

I have tried it since late It just seems that common courtesy, empathy and compassion are thrown out. There is no doubt however that the dating game itself is very daunting and filled with challenges! Too bad for me if this is only in the US… I am a widow of two years and I can say that maybe am doing good except for the fact that I really miss sharing to someone the things I have accomplished for the day…. Thanks for sharing with us. Whereabouts do you live?

Do you many members who live in the UK? I have recently tried to sign up but have not received a reply. WOW we need to be friends. I will NOT ever be on those dating sites. I decided to do it the old fashioned way. Any guy who cannot deal with my late husbands ring on my right hand can stay away. Do what is right for you AND your kids! They come first. If a person has a problem with my love for my late husband it their problem not mine.

Mark, I think you have been dating the wrong women! Not all women are like that and I hope you meet someone nice soon. Being widowed suddenly, unexpectedly, can be a make or break proposition. I prefer to consider that while I lost a dear spouse I was given a nearly clean slate to doodle on as I please or can afford! Dave left me with all the tools I need to begin a new and different life, and I honor him with my new happiness.

One month into my new devastated, widowed life, a wise widow told me the trick to successful widowhood was to be happy and sad at the same time. That has been my mantra; to live fully and with as little fear as is prudent. I dont do dating websites as I would always be making comparisons ,but it would not be fair to prospective partners. Its so nice to chat to someone who has and is still feeling emotional. I agree that finding someone that understands such a monumental loss would be a blessing.

I hope you find what we all need. I am from upstate New York. Hi Janice , I live in Glenview. My husband died in at age I became an instant widow In May We were in a car wreck and he was killed and I had severe injuries. I was widowed at I am now Tried this online dating and it is crazy. I just hate being lonely. I have taken some trips and such with friends, but miss a spouse. I guess it is probably not going to happen, but I keep hoping!! I certainly know how you feel although i never would try dating websites ,I like the thought that im not on my own,but it does nothing to ease the heartbreak good luck with your future bernie.

Ruth, What if there is a community of widows and widowers where you can consider family? Would you like to join? I have tried many had dinners and coffee dates with little success. I now beleive in socializing with groups being out there and meeting people. As a widow of 8 yrs this week I find being independent spending my time volunteering and in the company of family and good friends has bought me greater satisfaction.

I have cruised alone a couple of times made many friends on board, movies and dinner alone are quite interesting. Waiters are always attentive. My advice remember your loved is always with you in spirit and he or she has wanted the best for you even if it means being on your own for the rest of your days. I would love to meet somebody special but they have all been taken! Did you find may singles on the cruise, and if so approximately what is the age group on board? I first heard of Stitch on an evening news segment. I went to the site and joined up. I, too am a widow and recently retired.

Because of this I choose to meet new people, make new friends. I felt comfortable and safe. If all goes well there will be 20 of us. My intention is to keep an open mind. I want to be with others and laugh… should my prince charming come to be then so be it! I just wanted to say how excited I am to find this site. I am generally NOT comfortable with technology, but here I am.

So this is my first introduction to the world of posting …deeep breath…. As a widow of almost two years now, like everyone here, I do not care for it. At all. Long but beautiful story short, if you can believe it, we met as patients in a dialysis unit 12 years ago, me and my 30s and he in his 40s. First marriage for us both. In amazement, we both received kidney transplants 3 years later, just 9 weeks apart.

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He waited for 6 years on the list and I waited for Silver linings are sometimes where you reeeally least expect them to be. Sadly, with diabetes at the helm, a failing graft and a surprise bowl-full of lukemia, I lost the love of my life while holding his hand and kissing his forehead as he took his last breath. What a privelage. Heartbreaking, but a privelage.

This on the heals of taking responsibility for mom, then dad and saying goodbye over a 5 year period. We all have a story and this is mine, or was. Anyway, the point here being that we have all been through the impossible in our lives but are all still here — striving, mostly feeling determined while remembering, treasuring and looking for positive moments in each day and hopefully moving forward in the various forms that that takes.

Surviving for me, even at this point is making a conscious effort to compartmentalize grief the best I can…not forgetting or not feeling sad at any given moment…. Widowhood really, really stinks. But I think that part of the key to all this is shifting that focus toward appreciation of those who DO care for us, about us and hold our delicate hearts gently, even though the comfort and primary source of support is not coming from one main person. A few reflections : Bernie ….

Yup, you, and I suspect everyone else who is out there looking to establish something new but just as meaningful in the relationship department, are going to compare the relationship you had with what might be possible now, with someone else. That connection with your wife will always be there and felt. Indeed, as the anology suggests, that glass slipper has been tried on by my maaaany women!!!!

Makes me laugh!! Colleen — yes, like you say, I think my husband would want me to have the best that is for me. Karen — Horray for dinner with friends! THEY are your true friends!!! Lori — I can relate. A last thought…. I wonder if others had to find their own version of stabilization first like I continue to do?

It is taking time, but I am getting there. I look forward to reading more posts as they arise and might be brave enough to post again……. This is one of the most wonderful comments any of our members have ever shared on our blog — thank you so much for sharing. Yours is such a beautiful story, obviously one with a lot of sadness but ultimately what struck me most was the message of hope. That, and the need to treasure each day we get on this world! Many thanks to you Andrew and Marcie for the supportive and welcoming comments! Bernie — the sharpness of your pain will subside, I promise.

I never though it would, but it does, even as the memories float through! Andrew, I applaud your chat room but all of the participants seem to be so much younger than I. I am 69 years old and for 48 years 2 months was married to my best friend. We were both retired law enforcement officers. We had three children, one son and two daughters. Like a fool I got him breathing again before they got the crash art in there.

They immediately put him on a ventilator and transferred him out to another hospital. He never regained consciousness and died 12 days later. It has now been 17 months and although I am going through the daily motions if not for my little Yorkie I would be ready to leave this earth today.

I am an old-fashioned person raised on a farm and my life has never been easy so I am used to being tight with money. I like to cook country cooking and enjoy working around the house and going to my church.. And of course watching cop tv shows. I would like to meet a widow who would just like someone to talk to, maybe to go out Dutch treat to a local restaurant sometime or just talk on the phone. I really feel like a widow that had a long relationship and a happy one with his wife before he lost her is the only one that would understand me and me him.

I am not looking to replace my husband, because no one ever could. Just a friend of the opposite sex so that neither of us have to be the odd person out.

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I guess my time is over. I wish you all good luck for whatever you are searching in your lives. May God bless! I can however say that we have plenty of members your age and older on Stitch — we have members all the way from 50 through to 92! I am sorry but I just learned that you charge a subscription fee. That was not my understanding. So therefore I ask that you remove my name from your subscription lists. Good luck to you anyway. This on the heals of taking responsibility for mom, then dad and saying goodbye to my small little family over a 5 year time period. And then there was one…….

I also know that as disappointing as it is to be excluded from the couples thing, it might just be that those people are not intentionally leaving someone out? Kathryn, Thank you so much for being open, vulnerable, and inspirational as you share your story. We welcome you to our community with open and caring arms! Kathryn, Hello there! Can I have your permission?

Common ,Kathryn, help us. So glad you felt inspired by what I had originally written in my very first post ever in this world of internet blogging a few weeks ago and asking for my permission to re-post it on your site before actually doing so. Like all thinks in life, we must stay wary of all new situations and follow our gut and what we find comfortable or not comfortable with respect for oneself.

The invitation to join your web site widowhoodcircle. Why would you want to re-post my comments from this site to another site? There are many possible answers to this question, so before I, or anyone else for that matter, jump into something, I remain cautious. I am sure you and the others will find great success and hope that you do. What does this mean? Other questions or points of discussion surface in my thinking, but I think this is where I personally will leave it for this moment. My hope is that my response is received in the spirit in which it is intended, as gracious and inquisitive to you Sally and to the Stitch community.

Not to be overlooked, being a widow, or just loosing your spouse in general is awful. The more available the resources the better. Support comes in different forms and as you garner your strength and opportunities, I will continue to wish you continuous forward movement Sally! I am glad ,I found this site. I have read your stories and it helps knowning ,that I am not alone in my thoughts and challenges I now face.

My husband died 15 months ago he was 51 ,myself My sons are grown and my friends are all married with busy lives. Very lonely this new life or lack of………. Trish, I know all about lonely. Many friends are busy and I find that within their business, now that I have a different perspective, I am ultra careful not to be intrusive or demanding.

I love my friends dearly and I want to keep them and respect them. Well, creating that different kind of balance, like we all work so hard to achieve in this life is always going to be tough. I have been quite fortunate in that the few and close friends that I have are compassionate and loving and as inclusive as possible. Interestingly only generally , those who do not have kids like me, are more available. Looots of output of energy to keep going, of which comes in small doses for me.

Veeery slowly, I find I am becoming conditioned. However, with this web site, it seems a little more doable to me. We can do it. All of us here. I hope all this makes sense to somebody out there. Courage and strength to us all and lots of Kleenex for those awful moments that, yup, hit you like a toad killer of a storm! I only wish that were as easy as it sounds sometimes. I agree with the articles I just read — no matter the circumstances behind how we get to be alone we also have a chance to begin again and do the best we can to contribute in all we touch daily.

Live your best virsion of Y O U. MD Seeber. I am 66 yrs old, a widower for five years come October Together with Mel, Gick, and Abel, we are in the process of forming a community for widows and widowers. At the moment we are creating a website named widowhoodcircle. We are inviting those of you, widows and widowers who are interested to join the community.

This is my first time I was your site and would like to join with you. I love your site because I think I will my true love. I am a widow of 59 years of age. I love your site because I think I will find my true love. Great to hear from you Sandy! Yes please sign up for Stitch and we hope to see you as part of the community soon :. Hey Kathryn, you make sense to me! I have to get out of my lazy-boy and focus on the world outside my home if I want to be part of the world.


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Like you Kathryn, I cherish my friends and I am ever so careful about over taxing them, or cutting into their family lives. I do work-arounds; I try to see movies with my friends when their husbands are otherwise occupied thank you sports TV , for a cruise I was able to talk two other couples into going —to share the burden I perceive to be me. The biggest and most important hurdle for me is to make new friends. Never before have I felt such freedom and such angst. I gave my life lovingly and willingly to my elderly parents, my growing children, my income producing but not always fun!

I have to admit, I was a little excited that someone actually responded to what I said, so thank you very much. I am very impressed. I can relate to what you said to making new friends you can call up to go do something with. But you gotta get out there and DO things in order to even expose yourself to people. Nothing is pre-set. I guess it never was, but it sure seemed easier before. And yes, it is absolutely awful to be home alone, all day every day. There again, an opportunity, or rather an essential, to creating a completely new structure in life. Like you were saying, re-framing how you think of it and now acting upon what you want and need.

Feels uphill but little by little. Joking of course. I just want to have something else to think about or put my concerns and efforts into. The one thing that I can vouch for from the articles on this site is the one about finding something that somehow meets regularly. I forced myself to do this last winter because I was going out of my mind. You hit it on the head! I miss sitting on the couch together, watching re-runs and eating pizza and not caring if I have basil stuck in my teeth. I broke a small bone in my foot 6 weeks ago and only got up to feed myself for about 3 weeks.

It was so isolating. And they say adolescence is bad! Thank you for all your comments. I am a recent widow of 6 months, who moved into a new area shortly after my husband passed away to be near my daughter and her family in southern California this past summer. Life here has been difficult to adjust to. I have no friends here and now that the summer has ended, I see less of my grand children who have all now returned to school.

It gets lonely staying at home all day and night by myself. I frequent the libraries, the malls and recently, attended some classes for adults aged over 50 in the area. I am making some friends at my local church where I just joined their choir and go to grief support groups everywhere including at the local hospice. All helps me adjust to being a single again.

Life can be lonely at times, but I am making the effort to just be out there to meet people of both genders. Just try to be patient with yourself and others. Life can still be fulfilling with or without a partner. Mimi: I can relate! I was widowed almost 15 months ago and am still adjusting. There are so many things I enjoy doing, but not by myself. Whenever anyone invites me to do anything, I say yes, almost before the words are out of their mouth! To add to my situation, my entire family has relocated, within the past year or so, to the San Diego area, of course taking grandchildren and my brand new great granddaughter with them!

We were all very close, so this is a big loss to me, even tho I see them when I am able. Thank God for email, texts and FaceTime! I have mixed emotions about that as well, since this has been my home for many years. But time goes by too quickly and I feel I must adapt or get left behind. Stay well, and open to new opportunities! Thanks for your reply. We, widows, must stick together. Have you ever considered relocating to where your daughter now lives?

I, too, now live in San Diego near my daughter. It has been difficult making the adjustment, but I love being so close to her and my 4 grand kids. I am slowly building a new life for me here and making new friends. It is comforting to know that I at least have my family near by in the event of an emergency. And, she now has me too in her life again. It is not the same to just visit 2 or 3 times a year. The grand kids grow up so fast. I still have a 5 year old, 12 and 14 year old I can see grow up. The 17 year old is on his way out when he goes to college next year.


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I am their only living grand parent alive now and am blessed to have them in my life now that my husband is gone. Moving ton the SD area is certainly on the agenda. Once my daughter is settled in to her new home in Rancho Santa Fe, she will scout out some places that might be suitable for me.

In the meantime I am trying to get rid of the flotsam and Jetson acquired over the past 25 years. A little more than a year ago, they were mostly all here in the Bay Area, and my husband was still living. I just moved out of SD. You will find lots to do there. There are meet-up groups galore, lots of theater and philanthropic groups if you want to volunteer some. Unlike the Bay area it is hot in July, Aug, and Sept. You can make a lovely life for yourself there—loads of people in our same boat. Have fun! Thank you for your comments. I am quite familiar with Coronado, since my son lives there.

Not so much with the City proper. I did visit the beautiful Spreckels Theater year when my granddaughters danced in the City Ballet Nutcracker, followed by a fun dinner in Little Italy. I also visited and loved Balboa Park and the Zoo. I also visited Oceanside a few years ago. Speaking of Oceanside, have you heard of an over Anything you can tell me wd be appreciated! Why is another site being suggested when those of us that are close can come together for an event. I went to the Comic Strip last Fri. I loved it! I love Paulette, but will share that at least half of the women there wanted to know where the men were?

I have made several comments and have yet to get a yay or nay from anyone. I have skills and can go back whenever I feel like going back. I call the shots in my life! I am independent and do things for me. I am upfront and forward, but do have a good heart and will be there for the those that need me. You amaze me.

I like your thoughts on life. Your words sound that you are not judgemental at all. I have friends and activities but wish more were with singles because I hate the 5th wheel thing. I am a healthy, active old broad of 79 years old, that loves to have a good time. I try to always think of what the love of my life would say to me……….. I want to be happy but not with an other man. I have two widowers that are putting the move on me. Both are wonderful men but I am not interested in either or any but do not want to loose the many years of friendship, dating back to elementary school..

I truly respect each of them and really liked their wives. How do I keep them as friends and not men friends………. I did not read all of your emails on this site but I did not see any answers for me. Therefore, I ask for any advice anyone has to offer. I, too am a 79 year old broad! I know what you mean. Have you tried talking to your male friends frankly but kindly as you did in your message? Who knows, one or two might actually be relieved to know how you feel! Yes, this whole widowhood thing is not what I signed up for…it is lonely despite all our female friends and no special someone to share things with..

Los Angeles seems to be a particularly cruel town for women of a certain age. Needless to says, it was over very abruptly and my head is stil spinning. I know the dogs were. I know all too well how lonely it can be when we do not have that special someone to share with. I think that many people are fixated on wanting to have a long lasting romantic relationship okay cool, but what happened to meeting, making friends first?

Family comes first in my book. All 3 let know that they love me and are making bets as to who will take care of me when I can no longer take care of myself. Not bad for a chick from the hood… me. Rushing into things can only can sometimes leave a bad taste in your mouth. Please just come out with the expectation to meet new people and allow for the romance to bud and grow and flourish. Take it slow and let it flow! Doris, Los Angeles IS probably crueler than most towns. I think widowhood is like an extreme form of adolescence. It seems almost sacrilegious to utter those words, but when the hard grief dies down there must be a small part in each of us, widowers too, that breathes a tiny secret sigh of relief.

For me, I use it as a reminder that no life, no relationship, no partner is perfect. I too have that urning where does that come from, anyway, habit?


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I was married too long to believe in fairy tale romances but I do believe in the wonders and joys of a good partnership. Thank you Doris. I as you do the desire to love and be loved is alive within me. I have met a man here and there, but not one was able to gain my trust. Funny how one just wanted to know my financial affairs! Zero zero zero jerk! Another had no regard how sick I was feeling, another jerk.

I read often how Ms. So and so was swindled out of her money, jewelry, property or whatever for letting her guard down feeling sorry or trusting that person! Sorry there are many out there that are bad apples.

Thank you for keeping it real here on a most unpleasant topic. Just a quick note, women do this too, target men and show their true colors. It happened to a few people I know actually, even relatives. So indeed, keep your guard up everyone. Just make sure that when you feel that gut intuition when someone gets a little too curious or invested in your financial life, etc.

And make sure you actually do. A very interesting initial article giving a very thoughtful and sympathetic insight into widowhood. Lots of additional interesting and helpful comments here also. However, there is still much in life to be thankful for and to be enjoyed. Companionship I still miss but hopefully this site will help with that. Right on Boyfriend. I took care of him to the very end. Please and when I say everything I mean everything! Not one member of his family my former in-laws did nothing but talk smack.

Never did I get help from them to change a diaper, bathe or help feed him. His son even stole his money without me knowing. By the time I found out the cash was gone… Luckily for me I had set some to the side for his final good-bye. When Freddy died so did the make believe relationship I had with my in-laws! I was set free! Good riddance!

In the mean time hang in, enjoy what you have and tuck away what is now gone…. I am 79 years old, healthy and still have all my marbles I think! I miss my husband every day. He passed away in July, I would love to meet someone who is looking for companionship, not romance. I have women friends during the week to enjoy lunches with, movies, etc.

As an added twist, for various reasons, virtually my whole family has drifted southward in the last year or so. We were quite close and saw each other often, so a lot of my time was wrapped up with them. We are still in touch, but texts and pictures and even visits are not as fulfilling. Volunteering and gym time help. Still, I find myself reading about a new restaurant, a show or other event and wishing there was a like minded companion to enjoy those things with while I have the energy and enthusiasm!

I too am an Overnight widow of 3 years now. Here one day, gone the next! I am not looking for a new husband, I am just trying to live life one day at a time, one step at a time. It is sad we have to go through losing our spouses…and for me my son losing his father. But I can say I have grown through it and I think I will be a better friend, lover and wife to someone if I ever decide to start looking again.

I have 3 children and a job, so in that repsect i am lucky to be busy. Very true about not being invites out to grown up events…yes girl lunches, fundraisers. I was used to candles and fine dining there in the past, as I do here, but it was corn chips and dip, and spag bol. I am a family now not a couple.! People say that I cope really well, but i dont have a plan B for coping really well! Its still teriibly daunting sad and lonely, and some memories are horrific.. Old friends clearly change with many disappearing or changing their attitudes towards us as we no longer quite fit in the same way.

We get by on a day to day basis because we have to but some days that feeling of now being alone can be overwhelming. Wondering if anyone on this site has looked into Daily strength. I happened to stumble onto this site shortly after my husband died… It gave me a great sense of comfort to share my feelings with so many who shared the same loss that is so incomprehensible to many… The site allows people from all geographic areas to communicate and in the case of so many of us here in Los Angeles , we formed our own little chapters and organized our own gatherings.

It was comforting to be able to meet these individuals face to face and share stories— happy and sad. Certainly made me feel less isolated. Just a suggestion. Excellent suggestion, Doris. It is a large and active community and although it includes people from very different backgrounds, beliefs, values etc I found a number of like-minded people who I connected with and, if nothing else, it made me realise that the feelings and thoughts I was experiencing were perfectly normal for anyone going through grief and widowhood.

It also has the facility to write a journal which I know many also found helpful. I am 60, And we had many friends. The first year everyone bent over backwards to help and entertain me. Then I noticed I was not included in the parties I use to be included in. So have learned, I need to develop single friends and move forward. But it is very lonely and this time of year makes me sad.

Hi Karen. Just lost my husband of 31 plus years. I feel so lost. I am thinking I should retire but that is scarely by yourself. We use to have plan for that and I ask myself if I am strong enough to to follow that plan on my own… I am glad Christmas is over, it is such a drain on my emotions. I think I need to embrace the change in my life. I have no choice! Karen, about how you deal with it, you have no choice! It is painful,and lonely and there is no easy course through your grief.

I wish I could help you but I know you will need to work this out yourself. I and others can provide some support but you need to feel and get beyond the pain. Please contact me if you want to chat! Kind regards! I live in Australia… Delighted to know others feel the same about dating sites… Been a widow now ten years…. Have travelled a lot on Miya own..

No family here.. One in USA and one in another state.. I try, belong to clubs…. Friends dissapeared after his death… What do you find helps on anniversaries? Christmas etc… I tire of inviting people in.. Find gay guts best… Love some suggestions.. I was widowed when I was 42, my husband had had a heart attack 4 years previously when he was 42 but seemed to have recovered well so it was a shock when he had a second one at 46 years old. I have dipped into Internet dating and found it really not for me as, although I always state in my profile that I have a lot of responsibility for my grandchildren at present, men seem to want someone with no ties.

I have found it very hard over the years without Alf and would love to have someone in my life but no luck so far! I have been a widow for several years so I know what it feels like. I would be interested in starting such a group but I would like to see if other people are interested. I am in the Crystal Lake, IL area, contact me thru Stitch if you think this type of group would be fulfilling. Like all of you, I too am a widow, but have been widowed twice now at 51 year old. I was a blessed with a wonderful son though and I thank God for him everyday.

I am lucky I did not lose my son from it all. My son is now 30 years old and has endured so much, which I think is the hardest part for the spouse left behind, seeing the children suffer and miss their dad. Not sure how I found this site, but I understand how you all feel. Being a widow is very lonely after a while. I have been alone since when I divorced my second spouse, so a long time. I agree it is very difficult to meet someone and being a widow or widower does evoke pity and some stigma.

Would be nice to have a male friend at times. God bless all on this site, try to remember we are all in this world for a very short time, we will reunite with our loved ones in the future in heaven and will then be with them forever. I am trying to enjoy the time I have left here for now and trying to be mom and dad both to my son.

Ironically, his wife also lost her father in high school when he was also killed while pulling into his driveway and hit by a semi. One thing is for sure, none of us are alone, sadly so many have gone through the same and God carried us all through it. The good things that come from tragedy and loss are incredible strength and a complete lack of fear for the future, when you have been through the worst, what is there left to fear in this world?

God bless you all. I am just two weeks now in widowhood, I am 36 years old I have two children one is 6 and 3 years old. I am in the state of confusion and need an older widow to talk to me pls. Gentle, I would love to talk with you if it will help I was widowed in after 28 years with the best man in the world. I have good days and bad days and days when I dont want to feel anything but the world keeps moving on and I owe it to my family to do the same.

Please let me know how I can help you I am so sorry for your loss and at such a young age with young children. You are in my prayers please let me know how I can help. Hi Gentle, Your Stitch name here is telling of how I hope you are being with with yourself — gentle. I can only imagine how devistated you and your children are feeling right now and I am heart sore for you. It does seem especially cruel that this person, the man you loved has vacated his place in your lives sooner than he should have, through no fault of his own or any body elses although I do not know of his circumstance.

But as painful as this is for you right now, you are incredibly fortunate to have who you both loved so much in your lives which is your children. But remember, this is only a moment and you and your children have so much to look forward to. Just so much. But it will get better, incrementally. It WILL get better.

The best way I can describe my experiences is that it has been like taking one step forward, three or four steps back. Then taking one step forward and two or three steps back, etc.