This doesn't change anything in terms of what the various sects believe the "Mary was always a virgin" theory figures the kids were Joseph's from a previous marriage , but it does mean the Bible left out some of the most interesting stories. Did the other kids get along with Jesus? At what point did they know he wasn't just another kid he started schooling church elders as early as age 12?
If nothing else, it had to have made things weird around Christmas. David, second king of the United Kingdom of Israel, is without question one of the Old Testament's most recognizable characters. The wimp-to-badass story of young David going up against the giant Goliath armed with nothing but a slingshot is easily one of the most memorable passages in the Bible.
So, what happened next?
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Well, David won, obviously. At least, that's the only part of the story most Renaissance artists seemed to care about. There's a reason your Sunday school's VHS copy of David and Goliath ran out of tape before getting into King David's reign: If it were any longer, it would have touched upon how one of the first things David did as king was subject the wife of one of his soldiers to what Old Testament scholar Richard M. Davidson described as " power rape. Rather than doing the decent thing and rubbing one out right there on the rooftop, David instead had the woman fetched to the palace so he could perform some kingly insemination on her.
This put David in a bit of a pickle: The woman, Bathsheba, was not only married, but her husband, Uriah the Hittite, was a soldier in King David's army. Just goes to show it pays to check beforehand, huh? In an attempt to cover up what he'd done, David ordered Uriah to immediately go home and bang Bathsheba so that if she got pregnant, nobody would get suspicious. But when Uriah refused to go home out of respect for his fellow soldiers who were still on the field, David arranged for him to be sent to the frontlines of a battle aka "the place where all the arrows land" to make sure he'd never come back.
It worked out just as he wanted: The guy was killed. Andrew Burward-Hoy Probably in slow motion. Now, we're not suggesting that David's douchebaggery went unpunished. Bathsheba's baby died, and David's kingdom was subsequently subjected to some good ol' Old Testament smiting. However, it's hard to argue that David used his newfound king status for anything other than being a colossal dickbag, especially when you consider the fact that before his devoted soldier's corpse was even cold, he married Bathsheba and knocked her up again forthwith.
Cain and Abel were the first two sons of Adam and Eve, granting them the dual distinction of being the third and fourth humans to grace planet Earth and the first and second to be squeezed out of a woman's loins. You may also know them as the perpetrator and victim of the first murder. As the story goes, the two brothers entered a field one day to offer up their gifts to God, and after God liked Abel's gift better, only one brother was left.
That was Cain. Naturally, God got pretty pissed at Cain for inventing murder, but He didn't want to kill him, since that would technically classify Him as the world's first copycat killer. Instead, Cain was branded and forced to wander the world as a hobo, eventually settling east of Eden in a land called Nod. While God was none too pleased with Cain, He apparently hadn't quite gotten the hang of that whole "wrath" thing just yet. According to the rest of Genesis 4 , after taking away his favorite hobby and booting him out of Eden, God then went to great lengths to bless Cain along the way.
First he assured Cain that nobody would ever kill him, which by Old Testament standards is like winning the friggin' lottery.
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Then Cain found himself a sexy wife in Nod, had a kid named Enoch, and founded his very own city, which he also called Enoch. Apparently originality hadn't been created just yet. In short, Cain didn't just wander the world like Caine in Kung Fu -- he wandered the world like someone who wanted to be the next mayor of SimCity , and he begat a pretty impressive family along the way to back him up.
The Bible mentions children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren, one of whom appears to have invented the guitar. So in hindsight, it would seem that all God's pet Abel ever accomplished was to please God one day and then get his ass murdered. That's pretty small potatoes compared to his original sinner father, the Sower of Seeds, or his murderous brother, the Founder of Cities.
We'll let you come up with your own moral to this story. You could stay a hundred miles away from every religious text in the world and you'd still know this story by heart, thanks to holiday decorations alone: Jesus was born in a manger to a virgin named Mary. His Earth-dad taught him to be a carpenter at some point, and after he started a social charity club on the side, he was crucified by some particularly uncharitable Romans.
Three days later, he was resurrected from the dead, at which point he rose up to heaven. You forgot your many bags of shoes! The Gospel of John never quite gets to that "rose up to heaven" part. John 21 describes Jesus showing up on the shore after his death and making fish appear for his hippie pals. They proceed to have themselves a feast on the beach, and then Jesus asks Peter to follow him and go It ends with John , which says:.
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If every one of them were written down, I suppose that even the whole world would not have room for the books that would be written. And that's it. That's where the Gospel of John ends, and Acts opens with Jesus strapping himself to a cloud and bottle-rocketing it straight up to heaven. We tend to think of Jesus' ascension closely following his resurrection, but apparently there's an Earth-sized ellipsis in between those two events where God knows what took place literally.
This gives a whole new perspective to those "What Would Jesus Do? What would Jesus, newly resurrected from his own brutal slaying, do? We can think of several things we'd do, but they're not very Christian-like -- more revenge-movie-like. And, perhaps more importantly, why didn't any of his disciples feel it necessary to share any of those events with us? Was nobody taking notes? Were they afraid it would make the Bible too long? We're picturing Jesus feeding another crowd or walking on another body of water and his biographer standing there, like "Eh, they've got the idea by this point.
Juggle sharks? There has to be something that can keep their attention. Douglas A. McDonnell has no Twitter or cave to refer you to; he's just lucky to be here, and thankful, too. Do you have an idea in mind that would make a great article? Do you possess expert skills in image creation and manipulation? Even rudimentary? Are you frightened by MS Paint and simply have a funny idea? You can create an infographic and you could be on the front page of Cracked. I have come through a very difficult season in my life, and I have recently relocated and found a church home. I literally have had a season of walking by faith every step of the way and been through the fires, and God met me daily and sustained me.
I had victory. I believe the Spirit of God flows in this church, I had confirmation in my spirit that this was where I should be.
I have had prophetic words from some of the heavy hitters in Christiandom, so to speak, No stranger to this, and I truly believe that this Pastor is on track, in the Word, preaches and feeds his people, but what he prayed over me has really baffled me. Nothing against scripture, nothing personally attacking, it just has me quite unsettled. The article helped. I want to go deeper this year, and I want to be unencumbered by traditions-anyone growing up in the Body gathers those over the years, ha.
I want to be obedient, and Spirit sensitive, but also exercise caution and use wisdom. Thank you for a very constructive and reassuring word. I can only remember two very specific prophecies given to me in the last 30 years of my walk. Those two times related directly to an area of weakness in my life.
Both were warnings about something that would have absolutely hurt my heart, which in turn protected me to be able to continue to stand firmly. I was warned by God before it happened therefore capable of enduring. The second was general, and it has to do with what I am currently doing. I lost one thing specifically, but God reassured me, though His still small voice, that I would gained much more than what I have lost. Thank you for this lengthy and insightful article.
What do Christian writings tell us?
As scripture says — He is not a man that He should lie, nor a human being that He should change His mind Num. Thank you! Thank you so much for a great article. God is truly at work. I thank God for giving you the wisdom to write this article. I now have more clarity about prophecy. Thank you Dan. May God continue to bless you.. I was so blessed from reading this article. It confirmed a lot of what l has been praying for after l received my prophesy.
God has elevated me so high to a different level in my walk with him and in my job. I receive my prophesy and stand in faith, obedience and endurance. Confiming and informative, I truly believe I was lead by the Holy Spirit to this site. God Bless you. Really very very nicely and Spiritually explained. Hi Dan, a prophet asked me to give him my car. I just bought the car.
I lack the understanding of presenting a car I just bought its my only car to the prophet. I would run from that prophet. Hello I was recently given a prophetic word and it shook me to my core and left me speechless. I decided to research what prophecy was and I found your well written and executed detailed explanation. I asked God to help back it up so I know that God is speaking through the ones that are truly serving him and have a personal relationship with him. I am asking for prayer as I enter into a new season of my walk with Christ and move on to a greater purpose he has planned for me.
I so enjoyed the above article. Please help me understand this….. Mind you I saw her in the drivers side seat prior to getting out of my automobile.
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She had a lady in the passengers seat of her vehicle that actually came inside the same establishment shortly after I had with my son. Although the person might feel they were inspired of God to say that to you, there is no way we would know. I would not put a lot of stock in a parking lot prophecy like the one you describe. Very encouraging for one who has receives a prophesy. I have had a prophesy years ago and 8 years later I have had another prophesy confirming part of what has been said and new enlightenment. I was blown away but still I wait patiently on the Lord for him to reveal his promises as I am still waiting.
God bless you, thank you. So edifying thanks a million times and may GOD grant us the grace to work on our part for the fulfilment of our prophesies. There is a well known prophet.. That I must walk by faith and give money every time,large or sm.. But I might be wrong.. I think it can be used in the wrong way and that is there way to get money most the time.. My husband and I have been in large churches where the guest speaker spoke of giving a certain amount and God would do something by a certain time.
And within those few months later…what we were believing God for happened within 2 months. I do believe giving by faith.. I am very suspect of any prophet who is connecting his words with money. I am reminded of the sin of Balaam. This really blessed my life.. I pray for more grace on you sir.. I want to find out if prophesies can be rejected by the person receiving it.. I had 2 prophecies in our lives of a third child that will come into our life and bring peace and bond our marriage and twice my wife was pregnant and lost the child and now my marriage is going down the road of being broken.
Shaun, I am sorry to hear about your loss. Prophecy is often conditional and can change when circumstances change. For instance, God never over steps free will, so if you have a word that indicates there will be a child, but then people divorce, the choice of the parties can nullify the prophetic word concerning them. Out of Iif I learnt that 1. An individual asks for prophesy 2. My question is, I was googling to get a book on bible made easy.
Then came along amongst the discussion of such books an ad asking me to furnish my details so as to get a prophecy.
I then googled again to get better understanding of prophesy. After your explanation I am puzzled by that as above 1. We have never met. Seemingly he will use my date of birth. Is this mont fortune telling? Please assist me. I recently received a prophecy about my relationship, that my partner is not the right person and I should run away from him because he is dangerous. Truthfully, from my opinion what he said was very false because he is the most selfless and generous person I know.
Then for someone to say that he is not the right person and very dangerous. Please help me. Back in , while I was in New Orleans. Helping with Hurricane Katrina. I stayed in a Christian facility.
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At the end the director told me when we were praying that God said very clear to her that Kathy is Anna. I am Kathy. Can anyone help me or guide me. Listening to GJHS is the most important thing in my life. The reference is somewhat cryptic. Were they indicating you had a prophetic gifting Luke ? IF it is a true word he will make it clear and help you, especially since you are seeking to do his will and want to know how better to serve him and his people. Yours in Christ. Hi Trudy, This is a difficult word to discern because it is so general that many could say it was for them just as you are thinking it was speaking to you.
Although it could be possible that there are many in the meeting that need to hear this word, many maybe struggling with the same issue, it is more likely that this was meant for one person but delivered corporately to all. My experience that prophetic words to the Body at large are more general in nature as an exhortation or a warning, or an inspirational word that ALL need to heed or can learn from.
I would just continue to weigh the words ponder them , trust the personal leading of the Lord in your own heart, and apply as you can, but not put too much weight on it. It really helped me to understand some of the things I did not know. Answering questions,especially I recently received a personal prophecy.
Really and trully was blessed with the information. God increase you abundantly. Dan do you have a personal email I could contact you on? I have a question but would rather not share here! This article is so revealing. I had a revelation to future wretchedness I was to pass through. I went through the first phase in shame and backwardness which I had earlier seen but God spoke to me that reverse will be the case, which is honour and advancement Now is almost 20 years ago, the second phase has not come….. What do I do? Be humble, walk in love, and the Lord will promote you as he needs to.
Just do the right thing in front of you. I was new in my faith. And I had done horrible things in my past and had trouble believing God could forgive me. So one day I was building my faith up in him. Great piece, very inspiring and informative Hi, I got a prophecy from an elderly man I do not know and this occurred when I went out to run some errands. He prophesied concerning an area in my life which I strongly agree to because I have been sorting a form of clarity from God concerning that. Been trying to put the message together and execute it and I have also prayed about it to God to give me clarity.
Can I go ahead and do what I remember concerning what he said I should do or must I do Exactly what he said I should do even though I cannot remember all of it? Thanks for this revealing piece. Unfortunately, the month has passed and none was fulfilled. Recently, another prophet told me he could see my husband… And that he is fair. Sir I was given a prophecy by a man of God that I was destined to b great in life, that am the pillar in my family but since that time till I still beg money from my family even from my siblings am meant to give them.
Sir am totally confused please wot should I do. Am no longer the sane this article have answered many questions in my life more than I expected so powerful may our creater highly bless u in the name of Jesus Christ. There are a lot of prophecies who have numbers and charge for their prophetic word. How genuine are they? And should Prophets charge? Your email address will not be published. May 7, at pm. Trust7 says:. May 15, at pm. Dan Gallagher says:. May 18, at pm. May 13, at am. Lish says:.
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